GET OFF YOUR AZZ AND POST, FLEXO!

I'm watching L'Pool eviscerate Azzton Villa 5-0 here, Flexo...And no response from you, Sir? This may in fact be THE YEAR (after Rafa and Stevie G. sold their immortal souls to Satan for the EPL and Championship titles)...Apparently, the Prince of Darkness (or Ozzy Osborne) is keeping His part of the contract!

BTW...P'raps you'd better mail my sweatshirt back...Could be time to switch allegiances!
Be sure to say "Ta" to the staff of Abbey Tavern! (Or "Conas a ta tu," if you want to get ethnic!)

Cesc Fabregas = too good

Despite the draw this weekend, I was not disappointed by the Liverpool/Arsenal game. Both teams had something to prove this Sunday and it was apparent that some top-flight football...er, soccer... was in full effect. Gerrard was playing like a man on fire and I felt like Liverpool had come to terms with their previous mid-field and defensive shortcomings of late with inspired appearances by Alonso, Carragher, and Mascherano. The formation was unique to LFC and it was obvious that Benitez wanted to try out some more aggressive attacking football. The rub, however, was the high amount of injury in the game, four to be exact. The substitution of the injured Alonso for the defender Arbeloa was ultimately a poor decision. He lost possession more times than he should have and ultimately played as if he was out of position. Which he was. I was pseudo-pissed, expecting the last substitution to be Ryan Babel.

Liverpool remained the better side for most of the game. It seemed Arsenal was revitalized by the addition of Theo Walcott and the persistence of Kolo Toure. Although, at the end of the day it all came down to Cesc Fabregas' performance. He has been stellar this season as the leader of Arsenals 'new school'. All and all a great game.
But Fernando Torres is hurt, and that royally sucks for LFC. At least they still have a game in hand, even though they seem to have dethroned Fulham's reign as 'draw-specialists'. This has been a close season so far. What the hell? I thought Arsenal would be struggling to stay up and Liverpool would be unbeaten by now... so it goes.

New Season, New City, New State, New Coast

I have to admit, it has been quite a while since the last post. Much has changed and adjusting is more difficult that one might realize. After much deliberation, I have decided to fully dedicate this site to football randomness and try to catch on, and at least cover, the latter part of the beginning EPL/European season. Many apologies to the loyal drogbacites.

Speaking of the new season, I have a few quick observations that, seem to me at least, to be the most glaring. Firstly WTF Arsenal. Who knew that the exit of Mr. Henry would produce such a dominate team... who else besides your's truly. Now that Hleb, Fabregas, and even Walcott have the go ahead to run amuck in true classic 'gunners' fashion, the team seems more solidified and prolific in front of the goal than ever. The ole' kick the long ball to Henry routine was, in fact, quite stale. And now, luckily, he is sucking it up for Barca; as exemplified by the stalemate to Rangers over the past week.

I should also include a smaller WTF to Scottish football, which has started to establish itself in the champions league and the Euro. Congratulations! See Celticjack for some more Celtic FC nonsense, (even though their best players are from other countries far away from Scotland specifically Japan)

A second observation is one that I have reserved for Liverpool. As a fan, I am disappointed.
I am not disappointed in the ANY of the new transfers, which is a pretty shocking statement for one to make after a summer of immense spending. Torres is, simply put, f-ing awesome. I have no complaints about the seemingly tireless work-rates of Kuyt, Voronin, Babel, or Benayoun. All of the new transfers have blended in nicely to this upgraded Liverpool side which all but exploded at the beginning of the season. But come on Benitez! The rotation policy is preventing any player from establishing a groove. Use Torres as much as possible! My main complaint is with the veterans in the side. There have just been too many lackluster Gerrard/Alonso/Carragher performances, it has been aggravating. Saying so seems like sacrilege, but come on. Hopefully this will be remedied before Arsenal this weekend. This is their first test all season and they are only in 4th place. Boooooo. Stayed tuned for the dramatic result of the Arsenal game.

Furthermore: haha cheslea.... :( Jol... wtf city

Didier Drogba gets his Drogbacite on in new Rap Album

I am utterly speechless but not surprised
http://www.theoffside.com/world-football/didier-drogba-gets-his-drogbacite-on-in-new-rap-album.html

NO, FLEXO AND DROGIANS...THIS IS THE GREATEST THING EVER!

The prairie dog is good, Flexo, my weedhopper...but this "moon worship" event is soooo much more...soooo incredible...WHY ARE WE NOT THERE? No "butts" about it...it's not even a "split" decision...How can one ever go "back" to the way things were? How can we put this "behind" us, even if we have "posterior" motives?

We'll just have to "train" ourselves to look at life differently...and not "moon" over the past...

http://www.moonamtrak.org/index.html

This beats even the "Moon over my hammy" culinary delight at Denny's!

I am speechless....The words of Celticjack are ended now; they seem so "backward" and "asinine" in relation to this...

this is the greatest thing ever

"drama prairie dog"

the problem with thierry

It just occurred to me that Henry gets paid a mass amount of money for doing basically nothing. In fact, me-thinks Henry is the most overrated player in the universe, with the exception of course being krom from the omega-6c nebula. So, with this said, nothing would bring me more joy than to see Henry finally take up these lovely offers, what the great Jose Morinho would call "silly money", and finally go to Barca, as they have been just dying to get him. In conclusion, i think that arsenal need a striker that is not primarily composed of tinder wood.

"BELLAMY'S JUST A WARM FUZZY," CLAIMS CROUCHIE

In an abrupt departure from the popular misconception of his relationships with his teammates, this snap shows Craig Bellamy running to his Liverpool pal, Peter Crouch, for a consoling hug after a traumatic experience with a mean referee or a missed shot (one of many, no doubt)... Crouchie, known to his mates as "Big Huggee Bear," is obviously prepared to make the "boo-boo" go away, so that Li'l Craiggie can get back to harassing referees, insulting fans, and missing goals.

Says Crouchie: "Li'l Craiggie is SOOOO misunderstood...and this hurts him deeply. He constantly asks in our Male Encounter Sessions, 'Why don't anyone like me? Is it me breath? I bathe weekly, sometimes twice....and I haven't hit any women in at least a week! What is it?'"

{Editor's Note: Could it be his grammar? Or the fact that no one likes Welshmen--even other Welshmen and Welshwomen?}

Continues the "gentle giant," Crouch: " At Liverpool, we're not just a team; we're a psycho-social support group, providing mutual advice and mentoring as team members encounter life's little crises...Craiggie's crisis seems to be somewhat extended, beginning at his birth until right now...Not to worry: Big Crouchie loves li'l Craiggie...If we could just stop that mean ol' Alan Shearer from saying mean things about him..."

ANOTHER SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE: WHEN SQUIRRELS ATTACK!

An aggressive squirrel attacked and injured three people in a German town before a 72-year-old pensioner dispatched the rampaging animal with his crutch.
The squirrel first ran into a house in the southern town of Passau, leapt from behind on a 70-year-old woman, and sank its teeth into her hand, a local police spokesman said Thursday.
With the squirrel still hanging from her hand, the woman ran onto the street in panic, where she managed to shake it off.
The animal then entered a building site and jumped on a construction worker, injuring him on the hand and arm, before he managed to fight it off with a measuring pole.
"After that, the squirrel went into the 72-year-old man's garden and massively attacked him on the arms, hand and thigh," the spokesman said. "Then he killed it with his crutch."
The spokesman said experts thought the attack may have been linked to the mating season or because the squirrel was ill. {EDITOR'S NOTE: Or because the squirrel is a "sign" of the coming cosmic conflict? Hmmmm....

THE BLOGSTAFF OF "HAND OF DROG" IS UNABLE TO VERIFY THE SPECIFICS OF THE PHOTO ABOVE...COULD IT BE REASONABLE TO INFER THAT "JEDI SQUIRRELS" HAVE BEGUN TO MOBILIZE, TRAINING TO COMBAT THE COMING REBELLION OF A SATANICALLY-INSPIRED DEMONIC SQUIRREL HORDE? WE CAN ONLY HOPE THAT THESE "GOOD" SQUIRRELS WILL ALLY THEMSELVES "ON THE SIDE OF THE ANGELS"...CJ)

Whats going on with the transfer market

Why is the transfer market so lame this summer? I realize with the worldcup/ballack/sheva craziness of last summer that this year would be some what more subdued, but everything seems to be backwards, or even bizarro if you will. Chelsea purchased an awesome defender in PSV's Brazilian center back Alex for only $1!They are determined not to make the proverbial ass out of themselves this summer apparently. That is a stark contrast to the insane money purges Chelsea embarks upon each summer. I can only hope that they have something ridiculous in mind because, while this is better for their team, it is very boring. Newcastle, under the new management, seems to be up to their old self-destructive antics. I mean, they make a big poo-poo over signing.... JOEY BARTON?! Which team would voluntarily want to sign Joey Barton? That is like asking the FA to go ahead and fine your team for a bunch of zany behavior and horribly violent fouls. This is concurrent with Newcastle's recent desire to crap up their team.
I am sure Liverpool will be very interested in spending some of this new American money. Which means that they are going to sign some sort of dinosaur and suck up their team. Manchester United don't need to do anything as they can rely on the stellar, emaculate performances by Darren Fletcher, John O'Shea, and Alan Smith. : ( I am starting the think that next year, provided that they get rid of Henry, Arsenal will have their year.